Dear Internet Guy
Published by Becky S June 8th, 2004 in uncategorizedThank you for your kind e-mail letting me know that “most men think with their ancient lizard brains and will put their penises in anything with a vagina that moves and seems to be more interesting than the current vagina.”
We women are lucky indeed that men such as yourself are willing to educate us in the ways of the world. So thanks for the tip, but I think I will decline any future correspondence. It’s a shoot-the-messenger thing; I imagine you get that a lot.
Best wishes,
Becky S
Becky, forget about the internet men and have dinner with me.
PS - Do you like my new haircut? Someone said that no one likes me with short hair.
I like your new haircut Viggo.
And here I thought that was supposed to be a secret.
It makes you look like you need to put on hot pants and sing “It’s Raining Men”
Short shorts guy, I think your short shorts are cutting off the blood flow to your brain. You are just jealous that I’m such a Renaissance man.
PS Becky–I’m free on Saturday night. How about a date?
Viggo,
“Renaissance man”, if you mean one of those Dandies with a kerchief tucked in his sleeve, then I agree.
I think that Becky would rather go out with a real guy.
Becky, I am free just about every weekend. It is hot out now, so I can wear my short shorts when we go to your favorite bar. Let me know…
shortshorts_guy_loves_himself@yahoo.com
Viggo,
Did you get an email from the lovely Becky S? HA! I did, in it she professed her undying love for me. Here is her email:
“Is this a real e-mail address? You are too funny, short-shorts guy!
Becky S”
Are you jealous yet?
Short shorts guy,
Uh, yeah…the ravishing Becky S sent me an e-mail too! I will not display the note here, however, because it’s too private. But trust me–I can tell that she’s come under the Viggo spell.
If Viggo does indeed have email then I want to thank him for his beautiful little books! His poetry and art are wonderful. It is a privilege when someone lets you get a glimpse of their soul. - Thank you
It will be a real long shot I’m sure if he see’s this.
if this is the real viggo then your eyes speak louder then your words for i see pain and saddness in them, a longing for something that can’t be found. the paths everyone has chosen are paths of enlightenment but some are still in the dark. i have not read your books or have seen your art have seen your movies but only your eyes haunt me and are filled with saddness a hurt that goes deep. i hope you find it some day what it is your looking for.
ivy
Viggo,
Personally I like you with short hair, long hair, dark hair or light hair. I admire the fact that you’re a man of many talents. I think it’s great that you’re not just an actor, but a photographer, painter, poet, musician, activist, and a father as well. I wish there were more men in the world like you. I find you and your work very intriguing. I thank you for all of the wonderful entertainment and talent you have shared with your fans throughout your career. Continue with the good work.
P.S. If Becky doesn’t go to dinner with you, I’d be more than happy to. I too have fallen under the “Viggo Spell.” lol
Sincerely,
MaryEllen
Will the real Viggo Mortensen sign in…and will all the “extras” pleeeeease sit down!
Internet Man & Short-shorts guy: Time to get your “egos” out of orbit and join the REAL world.
Becky –
I’m sure that as much as the thought of 2 men vying for a date with you is pretty flattering, I hate to burst your bubble but…I don’t believe Mr. Mortensen has been staying awake at night waiting for your positive reply to go out with him. He (Mr. Mortensen) is a very quiet, shy and private individual, who does not play web/email macho games — nor does he “toot his own horn” about his many accomplishments or being a so-called “Renaissance Man”. His thought is that his poetry, photography, painting, acting & music are extensions of himself, and if others enjoy his works, that’s great — however,he doesn’t do them for anyone else’s pleasure or approval.
And just for the record: it doesn’t matter what his haircut looks like — it’s what his heart and soul look like.
Gypsy:
I agree with you 100% it doesn’t matter what his hair cut looks like. It is what on the inside that counts.
I’m not giving him my approval for all of his accomplishments in his life either. I just thank him for sharing them with people and letting other people catch a glimpse of his heart and soul, which he seems to put in all of his works.
Hmmm…with all of the accomplishments that everybody has listed, I have forgotten about the lovely Becky S and I have also fallen under the “Viggo Spell.”
O Viggo, Viggo! wherefor art thou Viggo?