There is a void in the women’s periodical market
Published by Becky S February 4th, 2005 in miscellaneous fluff, newsy, favorite
Good news! I am going into the publishing business to fill a terrible void in the women’s periodical market. Why do boss-across-the-hall and his ilk get magazines full of gadgets and half-naked babes, while we women get nothing?
Grrl Toys is my answer to Sync. Grrl Toys is not about the gadget–it’s about how you can sucker men into buying you the gadget. Some article ideas:
- Don’t Pay! Flirting your way to free labor and tech support.
- Bribe Him: How to shut your man’s piehole when he complains about the veggie burger you nuked him for dinner.
- How to Prank: Using The Clapper to crash his video game console.
- Eye Candy: Dispatching the fire department to your office building in three easy steps.
Send me an e-mail if you’d like to invest or subscribe.
career favorite miscellaneous fluff Newsy viggo mortensen
Hey…how did you get my picture?
I can vouch for Becky’s penchant for the noble fireman. In fact, after a recent situation that called for the FDNJ here at the Soulless Office Park, Becky and several of our female co-workers were observed discussing the firemen. There may even have been some giggling.
The theories of Grrl Toys in practice? Perhaps I should reopen the investigation into the “damaged sensor” that cause problems with our fire suppression system.
Don’t be silly, Raul. To curry favor with Becky, I agreed to be her first cover model.
I NEED this magazine. Before Superbowl Sunday, please?
What’s all this, IT Security Dude? The fire department’s soulless office park visit was a pleasant diversion, but we were not giggling.
If there’s anything you can do to re-damage that sensor…
I like making guys uncomfortable when they stare at my boobs. I have not perfected the art of making them uncomfortable, but it is a process in progress.
My prev comment was supposed to be a article idea for a potential future issue.
Brilliant juxtaposition of power tools and male lust object. A man who can make muffins and be a stud muffin? I think you’ve got a winner here. I certainly hope you get Diet Coke to be one of the advertisers with images of the construction guy they used in their commercials. Count me in. I may have to write a few editorials myself.
Wow, with so many good ideas from Philly women, we could probably make a real magazine. Or at least a zine.
Sam, please keep us updated. There is someone who keeps staring at my boobs, and I would like to try your method.
Do they think we don’t notice them staring directly at our chests, or do they just not care? I find it slightly amusing.
That is one of the most disturbing concept magazine covers I’ve ever seen.
You should write up a column about one of these particular topics and submit it to some local alternative magazine.
I wrote “…may even have been some giggling.” Perhaps, though, that was the reaction of the male denizens of the SOP to the female denizens’ reactions to the presence of the firefighters at the SOP. Way too many prepositional phrases there, but who’s counting?
On the subject of guys being caught staring at boobs… some men do enjoy leering and do not particularly care if they get caught. Some of the more primitive ones even view such behavior as a perfectly acceptable predecessor to courtship and subsequent mating rituals.
Incidentally, my references to “some men,” “they,” “courtship,” and “mating rituals” are not accidental. I’m going back to my anthropological roots. Because, truly, such individuals are from a subculture of masculinity that I do not fully understand
Sorry to double post, but I just thought of something.
“You want a Christmas card? Here’s your Christmas card!”
classic.
I am conflicted here, I am concerned by the dude, but I really like Kitchen Aids (and I’m not joking about the Kitchen Aid thing, they rule!).
I also like muffins.
As for staring at boobs, while I myself don’t find it to be acceptable behaviour, there are sometimes when one is compelled to stare, mostly because they take up the entire field of vision, under normal circumstances I am a complete gentleman.
Sign me up!
Speaking of Super Bowl Sunday–can you combine some nice shots of eye candyprofessional athletes and appliances–maybe a tight end vacuuming? How to get her steamed up (shirtless beefcake ironing). Men doing household chores with appliances is a big turnon! Of course you would have to spin this for women–”Letting him know what really turns you on.”
“Men doing household chores with appliances is a big turnon”
hmmm, is that true? I need all the help that I can get.
I like the idea of a magazine that objectifies men very much.
I will agree to be a (mostly) silent partner
Only requirements:
1) Grrl Toys must have a sports section (note: firemen jogging is considered a sport)
2) I must be part of the cover model approval committee
Oh, please please please!
Raul I cannot speak for all of womenkind, but I once hosted a “Newlywed Game” at an engagement shower and couples were asked what does he do that turns you on the most? One woman answered “him ironing naked.” Apparently the combo of men doing housework with flesh exposed kept that couple from ever leaving the house when they were supposed to go to some function. I also find men willing to pitch in with the chores–especially with something motorized–exciting.
If ironing naked is what it takes, I am in trouble. I still have a scar on my hand from an ironing accident in Russia, I can’t imagine what would have happened if I wasn’t fully clothed.
I wonder if this motorized and ironing fetish is akin to why people watch nascar. To me, hot irons and things that spin do not mix well with things that dangle.
I think that is exactly what makes it exciting–the vulnerability which then can be put to good use.