I am currently testing a cereal called Optimum Zen, a Nature’s Path product. According to the back of the box, Optimum Zen will “bring back the peaceful sigh of being in tune with yourself, those carefree days when all you have to do is enjoy physical and mental harmony.”
Who knew you could get Zen and mental harmony from eating cereal? I always thought you had to meditate and study scriptures and rake sand around little rocks to get Zen, and who has time for that shit?
Optimum Zen has cranberries and ginger for inner harmony and also contains inulin, a natural prebiotic fiber found in chicory root. But the best thing about Optimum Zen is that it’s Optimum. Here in the 21st century, why should we have to settle for mediocre Zen when we can get OPTIMUM ZEN?
In fact, why aren’t more products available in Optimum form? I’m ready for Optimum Peanut Butter and Optimum Gouda and maybe some Optimum Pad Thai.
UPDATE: I had my first bowl of Optimum Zen this morning and don’t feel very zen. I wonder how many bowls it takes for the inner peace and harmony to kick in. Also, I added strawberries, which could have interfered with the harmonious flow of the cranberries and the ginger.
consumer whore favorite food Newsy wtf?
I would stay away from any “prebiotic fibers.” You just need to feng shui your office and home.
I had a hamster named Zen. I hope this is not where he disappeared to.
Have you seen the nutritional information on Pad Thai? I think it’s beyond Optimum and well on its way to Hazardous.
Optimum Beer, please.
Even better… Optimum Stuffed Pretzels.
elerfied, I think that Optimum Zen is a vegetarian, hamster-free cereal.
Optimum stuffed pretzels? Like maybe a pretzel stuffed with Camembert or Epoisses Berthaut? Mmmm…Optimum!
eight.
Becky of JaMu:
The Heretik wanted me to tell you he had me fix the Blogostan Update From Out there entry. Your Zen cereal thing is on there. Click the homies’ page to see it. He also told me to tell you the following:
Good job, give yourself a pat on your Utah loving back. Now get back to work.
The Heretik’s Research Assistant.
Hey, um I have had the cereal plenty of times and I can assure you that it’s all a mental thing and that you will feel more “Zen” if you believe that you do.
I got this cereal at Costco because they used to have the Optimum Power type there, but no more. The Power varitey had blueberries and flaxseed. The latter are really good at getting stuck between your teeth. Other than that, it was good stuff. But this Zen … hmm.. Those dried cranberries are just barely above the edible threshhold. I’ve taken to feeding it to our new baby parrotlet, who loves it. Maybe birds need Zen more than us humans do.