So which pyramid has the fluffernutter?

which pyramid is this in?

Just when you figure out the one-size-fits-all food pyramid, Uncle Sam scraps the whole system and replaces it with twelve different pyramids, all of which have vertical stripes that are not only unfashionable but fuck up the entire pyramid metaphor. People, pyramids do not have vertical stripes!

Due to a bad case of pyramid paralysis, I haven’t eaten for two days and will soon be too weak to type. Luckily, the United States Department of Agriculture (USDA) has a website that will select your perfect, personalized pyramid. Except the dang thing isn’t working right now, so let’s all relax over a nice peanut butter and Fluffernutter sandwich. Drinks are on me.


19 Responses to “So which pyramid has the fluffernutter?”  

  1. Gravatar Icon 1 Jen

    Seriously. What’s up with the color-coded pyramid? They should have matched the colors to the terror warning alert system. Veggies, fruits are green. Sugars are red. Dairy is yellow?

  2. Gravatar Icon 2 yoko

    mmm, fluffernutter.

  3. Gravatar Icon 3 Sherri

    Is “peanut butter and Fluffernutter” a redundant phrase? It’s a darn yummy sandwich, to be sure (drool), but I’d always thought that “Fluff + peanut butter” is exactly what the word “Fluffernutter” meant….

  4. Gravatar Icon 4 very metal

    It’s more like a “food prism” — prisms have vertical stripes, right? Like that Pink Floyd album cover, I think.

  5. Gravatar Icon 5 Sassy J

    A pyramid with stairs is a ziggurat–”an ancient Mesopotamian temple tower consisting of a lofty pyramidal structure built in successive stages with outside staircases and a shrine at the top”–so really the USDA is telling us to worship food–and considering 2/3 of adult Americans are overweight, and 1/3 are obese–we already do!

  6. Gravatar Icon 6 Clair

    Screw the pyramid, go with a pie chart.

    Hmmm…pie chart.

  7. Gravatar Icon 7 Becky

    Wow, you all are so brilliant. Jen, I like your idea to use the terror alert colors for the food pyramid. We should just combine the USDA with Homeland Security to reduce government bloat and capitalize on the synergies of these departments.

    Sherri–right! Fluffernutter & peanut butter is indeed redundant. This place needs better editors.

    Food ziggurat? Sounds cool, but if we use a reference to Mesopotamia to influence our eating habits, haven’t the terrorists won? That’s outrageous and won’t happen again under the combined USDA/DHS scheme.

    So we’re left with food prism or food pie?!?

  8. Gravatar Icon 8 Dana

    I’m in!
    what type of wine will you be serving with the fluffernutter
    and don’t try to give me any of that domestic or imported beer crap. I am a spoiled princess and demand WINE!

  9. Gravatar Icon 9 Becky

    Hmmm–what wine pairs well with a fluffernutter sandwich?

    There’s a wine and peanut butter pairing in NYC on May 1st!

  10. Gravatar Icon 10 Clair

    “I am a spoiled princess and demand WINE!”

    Let me guess…white zin.?

  11. Gravatar Icon 11 Dana

    well
    i prefer a merlot
    though on spring evenings a light pinot grigio is welcome
    and i can make homemade sangria with brandy that will knock you on your ass

    White Zin will do in a pinch.

  12. Gravatar Icon 12 Becky

    Dana, Clair is just being a smartass because he was offended by your “beer crap” comment.

  13. Gravatar Icon 13 Clair

    I was being a smartass about the pie chart too.

  14. Gravatar Icon 14 Sherri

    I think champagne would be the only way to match a fluffernutter…

  15. Gravatar Icon 15 Raul

    I think that a nice Port would compliment a fluffernutter well. Sweet with a bite.

    Or maybe a Mead…

  16. Gravatar Icon 16 Raul

    I just thought of another great complimentary drink…Chimay Triple. Alas, I will have to wait until November, it is to warm outside to drink a triple. I will post again when the weather is much cooler.

  17. Gravatar Icon 17 Scott

    Mmm, I like champagne with anything.

  18. Gravatar Icon 18 Becky

    Maybe my next party will be a beer/wine/champagne/peanut butter event.

  19. Gravatar Icon 19 Clair

    I actually judged a peanut butter ale once. It wasn’t awful (but I wouldn’t want more than a sip).