VP of cottage cheese?
Published by Becky S June 14th, 2005 in miscellaneous fluff, wtf?
A few years ago, I was watching a James Bond movie—From Russia With Love, I think—and was surprised to see Sean Connery getting it on with a beautiful woman who had less that perfectly smooth thighs. I’d have to watch again to be sure, but I think that she had what today would be called cellulite. In 1963 this condition didn’t cause the director to find a new actress or to edit the offending footage, which just reinforces my theory that the so-called cellulite problem is a recent invention of the cosmetics industry.
Even though I don’t believe in cellulite, I was both disturbed and amused to read about Dick Cheney’s cellulite nightmare in the Weekly World News.
Cheney is one of a handful of men who are cursed with unsightly and embarrassing “cottage cheese thighs,” an affliction that victimizes one in three women over the age of 25 but just one in a million of the guys.
Sources say the Vice President has suffered since he was in his mid- 20s but only recently allowed a photographer to capture for posterity his “cellulite secret.” The pictures were supposed to be kept under wraps until after Cheney’s death…
I could rant about the choice of words (e.g., affliction, unsightly), but since this story came from the same publication that reports on Al Qaeda’s plans to develop a Gay Bomb, I won’t waste the energy. Still, maybe it’s time to stop reading the Weekly World News, since I don’t want to think about the Vice President’s cottage cheese thighs before breakfast. If you’re reading this over a meal or coffee break, I do apologize. Blame very metal.
cellulite cheney miscellaneous fluff wtf?11 Responses to “VP of cottage cheese?”
- 1 Trackback on Jun 14th, 2005 at 12:05 PM
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This sort of scapegoating should not be tolerated in the “one big happy” blogosphere universe. Plus, if you wanna blame anyone, it’s all my parent’s fault for giving me the “Weekly World News gene” — much like your parents (well, your mom) gave you the “ask for directions” gene.
yeah, the WWN totally dropped the ball on the whole al qaeda gay bomb thing, it was actually the US who was researching the gay bomb.
I am so sad that no one wants to discuss cellulite or Dick Cheney’s thighs or both.
Perhaps Cheney can enlist Halliburton to engage in a multi-billion dollar reconstruction project on his thighs.
Like your black eyes, Cheney’s cheesy thighs are visions I am trying to purge.
I dunno, Type E…I heard that Halliburton overcharges. Of course, when you’re talking about thigh repairs, no price too high.
Judy, it has come to my attention that the picture of Dick Cheney is scaring people away from Good Grief!, so you may be on to something.
In all the pictures I have seen of him, he always appears to be at least a little bit angry.
A treasure trove of Cheney pix! No thigh shots, though. Awwww…