Consumer whorism is such a drag

Ann Taylor Loft woman: Can I start you a wardrobing room?

Me:
You mean a fitting room?

ATLW:
Yes, a wardrobing room.

5 minutes later:

Ann Taylor Loft guy: Would you like me to start a wardrobing room for you?

Me:
I already have a fitting room, thanks.

5 minutes later:

Ann Taylor loft guy: You’re ready?

Me:
Yep.

ATLG:
Your wardrobing room is the one with the black coat hanging on the door.

Me:
Great, thanks.

ATLG:
Oh, and if you need help with a size or with making a fashion decision, I am happy to assist.
areyousayingthatmybuttistoobigforthesepants?

ATLG:
Because I noticed that you don’t have a shopping buddy today.
mybuttistoobigandiliveasadandlonelylifewithoutshoppingbuddies?

Me:
*sob*


12 Responses to “Consumer whorism is such a drag”  

  1. Gravatar Icon 1 Clair

    Who’s Ann Taylor and why were you shopping in her loft?

  2. Gravatar Icon 2 very metal

    when i shop at ann taylor it’s a drag as well. ba-dum-bump. thanks a lot, you’ve been great.

    the joke is that i am a boy and they sell girl’s clothes. ok.

  3. Gravatar Icon 3 Becky

    very metal, I am throwing virtual tomatoes at you right now.

    Clair, Ann Taylor Loft is a cheaper version of Ann Taylor, or something like that. I go there because it is near work.

  4. Gravatar Icon 4 Jen

    Hmm.. I’ve never noticed if they call it a wardrobing room here. I’ll have to investigate this matter further.

  5. Gravatar Icon 5 Sassy J

    “I noticed you don’t have a shopping buddy!!!” What is that? An attempt to make your self-esteem plummet so you will buy more to get a momentary consumer whoredom rush? Or sadness that there aren’t two consumer whores encouraging each other to purchase?

    And for the record, all this big butt stuff is ludicrous. I have seen your (clothed) butt in many guises and it has never, ever looked big. Also–that “pout” emotional flavor is more like sex-pot. Big butt indeed.

    Miscellaneous note: Time to think about a soup exchange. Yoko, are you in?

  6. Gravatar Icon 6 Raul

    I like your “pout” emotional flavor…hubba hubba (do the kids still say that?)

  7. Gravatar Icon 7 Clair

    So if you worked near an Army/Navy store you’d be trying on combat boots and such?

  8. Gravatar Icon 8 Becky

    Absolutely, Clair. I hate shopping and will, therefore, go wherever is closest. Fortunately, I know of no Army/Navy store in University City.

    Thanks, Raul. I look exactly like that picture.

    Sassy, I know! I’d like to say that I marched out of the store in a huff, but sadly I bought a bunch of stuff. Somehow I managed to make fashion decisions all by my lonely self.

    Jen, I really am curious to know if the “wardrobing room” phrase is an Ann Taylor coporate mandate or something specific to this store in Philly.

  9. Gravatar Icon 9 Tom G

    I just showed this to The Missus, an Ann Taylor connoisseur, and she said that the Ann Taylor Loft in University City is very very odd.

  10. Gravatar Icon 10 Becky

    Hmmm, perhaps I should consider switching jobs.

  11. Gravatar Icon 11 yoko

    Becky and Sassy J– by all means, please count me in for the soup exchange! But don’t count me in as a shopping buddy.

  12. Gravatar Icon 12 enrico

    areyousayingthatmybuttistoobigforthesepants?

    :oD