Good Grief!

Fergies: Becky and Blankbaby

Everyone was at Fergies on Saturday, along with Strolling Luna and her creepy x-ray camera.

True, I wouldn’t mind losing that holiday weight, but I was thinking more like a few inches off the hips. Though I suppose that being transparent has its advantages (such as the ability to render the great Blankbaby speechless).

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Sunday’s Philadelphia Inquirer contained a story about three advertising agencies that were asked to bring Benjamin Franklin into the 21st century. The first effort, by Gyro Worldwide Advertising, is a sad attempt to highlight Franklin’s “bad-boy side:”

So, if [Franklin] were around today, he’d plow all that cash he made from inventing stuff into his true passion - the ladies. We think he’d have his own bawdy men’s magazine, called Franklin, complete with curvey photo spreads such as “Hotties of the Revolution,” and articles on “How to be a Playa at the French Court.”

Please. For once, Philebrity’s wrath has a well-deserved target.

Another firm created FISH, a Franklin-Is-Still-Here secret society complete with faux street art and a forum: FishAndVisitors.com. Members have spotted Franklin all over the city, from the basement of Drexel’s library to the Standard Tap. Sure, the whole thing is just for shits and giggles, but considering the recent bad press around Sony’s fake graffiti ads and Coke Zero’s phoney blog, I’m not sure I’d hire this agency.

Er? On Craigslist it’s April Fool’s Day instead of Friday the 13th: http://philadelphia.craigslist.org/rfs/124999234.html

[via Fishtown.us]

UPDATE: 700 Club is also for sale! I love how you’re supposed to ask the bartender for information during normal business hours.

Life is too hectic at the moment to write much of anything. However, I will say this: when you’re in the office restroom and the
bracelet on your left wrist somehow gets stuck in the elastic on the back of
your underwear and your right hand can’t quite reach around to untangle the
mess, well, that is a pickle. A pickle
indeed.

After logging ten years in Philly and the surrounding ‘burbs, I finally dragged my caffeinated self down to Broad Street and the annual New Years Day Mummers Parade, where men wear sequined feathers and open container laws take a holiday break. After walking South from City Hall, cold and without drink, some familiar faces at Broad and Tasker were a welcome sight. Their apartment was like a beautiful oasis stocked with cheese, chili, and beer.

Mummers are a great way to test out a new Christmas camera, and there are more shots on Flickr. Happy 2006!

Last week was the office Christmas party and another round of holiday videos created by my super-secret coworkers. Terry’s contribution is now online: Searching for Santa is a short film about a scheming holiday party committee and some university scientists who tag Santa for research purposes. It stars Scott McNulty of Blankbaby fame, Janice, Ryan, and Joe, who attempts to deconstruct the mythology of Santa Claus.

Though not mentioned in the credits, the film also stars my stapler.

Watch Searching for Santa.

As part of its annual holiday party, my department screens employee-created, holiday-themed multimedia presentations. I am excited to announce that Super Secret Coworker Dan has posted You Better Watch Out, a classic presentation from years past. This (very) short film features a menacing Santa Claus chasing three friends through the bleak streets of Philadelphia, accompanied by an appropriately ominous soundtrack. You should watch it right now!

Good Grief, did someone take my Jesus flogging photo and turn it into an animated gif?

Last year I posted The Life of Jesus in Christmas Lights, photos from a truly bizarre neighborhood holiday light display. Every year some folks in Blue Springs, MO use the medium of lights to tell the Christmas story. And the Easter story.

I am happy to report that my coverage of this exhibition has brought Blue Springs the recognition it deserves: the number one spot on the 12 days of Kitchmas.

At least in Blue Springs, Missouri, they’ve gone beyond the usual fare. Passing motorists are invited to rubberneck the blood-soaked scourging of Christ – a Mel Gibson-inspired Bible belting of truly epic proportions. Like it or loathe it, it’s a discussion starter and earns this year’s top award.

The Jesus lights beat out the likes of the Miracle Wheel and some faith poker chips, so that’s a pretty big honor.

The Life of Jesus in Christmas Lights is now on Flickr, complete with bonus shepherds and patriotic finale.

Last week, the Humus Reform Committee* appeared on this site, accusing me of taking bribes from Bobbi in exchange for promoting her most excellent hummus.

Sadly, I have received no free hummus from Bobbi. Which isn’t to say that I’m not open to the idea of pay-to-play blogging. After all, Good Grief! is a Philadelphia website. So send me your bribes, payments, and kickbacks, and I will write a nice haiku about your product.

*The Hummus Reform Committee is a bit unnerving. A note sent to its gmail account (hummusatune at gmail.com) resulted in the following reply:

We are in every middle-eastern restaurant, every hummus-serving bar and every supermarket. And now, we are also online.
p.s. We heard you consumed peanut-butter hummus. This action is still under review.